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Wife Of A YouTuber

When Covid hit and the video idea for the bakery was put on hold and I decided to continue to pursue videography, no one really knew what that meant. Not even me. I was watching a lot of YouTube learning from tutorials, but I was also watching a lot of vloggers. I loved how you could become a small part of someone’s life anywhere in the world through your phone or computer and I wanted to share my life in that way. Interesting or not.

Of course, when I started YouTube, I talked to my wife about the idea of recording our lives and sharing it with the world, and like any supportive loving wife she humored me and even liked the thought of it herself in some ways. But like me, she had no idea what that really meant.

It started with me just carrying a camera around recording all the time and learning how to make videos out of it. No big deal. But over time the process began to take its toll. The time it took to edit the videos started to become a burden. Not to mention being trapped inside and limited to what we could do because of Covid.

She began to feel like there was another person in our lives, almost like another woman! And that woman was stealing her husband, taking up all his time, consuming all his attention. She started to notice how the only time he had for her, all he wanted to do was talk about the other woman. She became very sensitive to the presence of the other woman, how he wouldn’t seem like he was a part of the moment. Instead, he was thinking about her, what she’s capturing, how he can use it later. In the middle of conversations, he would get up and walk across the room to move her to another angle. And finally, one day she couldn’t take it anymore.

She finally broke down and told me what she was feeling. She had been dropping hints for a while but never really let it all out. She was afraid it would hurt me. She was second guessing herself thinking she was just being emotional, irrational, or just jealous. Jealous I had found a passion and she was just realizing she didn’t have a passion herself. But she couldn’t work through it on her own. And she shouldn’t.

We talked, and it definitely brought a lot of things to my attention I needed to work on. I was learning…..ALL aspects of it! Hannah felt strongly that she wanted to make sure we captured life as we lived it and not live life just to capture it……..

We decided to try vlogging together. As a way for us to go on this journey together. Then maybe it would feel like the effort was being made for the good of both us, not just me. But that didn’t last long. Hannah enjoys making videos, but she dosen’t love it like me. By this time, we were at least talking more and more of what life would look like sharing it with the world and why, and I had started paying more attention to the time it takes to create videos and figuring out ways to do better with my time.

The end of 2020 started rolling around and I decided to make a video to recap the year. I wanted to tell the story of how I found videography, the process I had gone through to that point and what it meant to me. I pulled out all the footage I had from the last 8 months and got lost in what felt like years of life captured in time. The highs, the lows, the happy the sad, the inspirational and depressing, and it was magical for me…..and when Hannah watched the video….it was magical for her too.

It made what I….what we were doing make sense. It gave it meaning. Not only were we capturing life and sharing it with the world, we were recording memories that would last forever.

We started receiving messages from people that followed us telling us how we had an impact on their lives, how we were inspiring folks, or even just giving a little bit of hope and entertainment in a world that seems to be struggling for answers.

The idea of capturing life and sharing it has began to grow on Hannah. Like all things, there is a process. Sometimes it works, sometimes it dosen’t. It can happen fast or extremely slow. It can be easy or hard. You can bend to the process or the process can break you. But at the end of the day if you truly follow your heart and seek out God’s will for your life, the process of all things will eventually reveal itself to you.

Ecclesiastes 8:6

King James Version

Because to every purpose there is time and judgment, therefore the misery of man is great upon him.

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